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A vibrant and refreshing salad to help usher in the spring season. . .
To read the blog post and see the recipe, please come on over to my new blog home, Diet, Dessert and Dogs! Just click here.
There’s also a great giveaway over there you might like to find out about. . . 🙂
© 2009 Diet, Dessert and Dogs
Please Standby
March 11, 2009
I’m going to be dashing around town for the next couple of days, doing cooking classes (short notice, but if you’re in the Toronto area, I’ll be at the Bayview/Sheppard Loblaws tonight at 7:00–would love to meet you!), and then my friend Babe is coming to town tomorrow, so I won’t have much time for cooking (except for other people, that is).
When we were undergraduates, my friend Babe had a roster of what she called “permadates.” These were straight guys who were no more than friends, but were willing to stand in whenever a male presence was required–at a work function, say, a family wedding or bar mitzvah, a school reunion, etc. She’d call up the permadate and he was always happy to receive a free meal, free booze, and maybe some dancing in exchange for allowing Babe hang on to his rippled bicep and elbow for the evening. A win-win!
I think the same concept extends to foods as well. Don’t we all have our own favored dishes, the go-to recipes that we whip up when we need something that will impress, will look good and taste good–and which won’t expect any “favors” at the end of the evening? These are the “permadishes,” the old standbys that never disappoint.
I’ve been relying a lot on “candida standbys”–simple foods that are compatible with the ACD–this week. A lettuce wrap here, some baked tofu (without soy sauce, of course) there, here a roasted veggie, there a baked sweet potato, raw almonds and pumpkin seeds everywhere.
Then I realized I’ve already got quite a few candida-friendly dishes right here on this blog–dishes that are already in my repertoire, but happen to be suitable for the ACD. These are great for anyone who’s battling candida, but even more, for anyone who’s seeking a cleaner, less toxic, anti-inflammatory, immune-boosting diet as well.
Until I cook again, I’ll leave you with some of these reliable favorites. Nothing like a good permadish to get you through a busy week!
- Raw Almond-Veggie Pâté (omit miso if you’re sensitive)
- The Perfect Guacamole
- Cheela (Chickpea pancakes)
- Avocado Mayonnaise
- Lentil-Tomato Spaghetti Sauce (omit the spaghetti, of course!)
- Roasted Garlic and Pumpkinseed Pesto
- Balti Tofu and Chickpeas in a Thick Creamy Coconut Sauce
- Kitchari (an anti-candida stew)
- Quick and Easy Tofu Masala (omit mushrooms for ACD)
- Sweet Potato and Kasha Burgers (use non-fermented soy sauce, such as Bragg’s)
- Cauliflower, Parsnip and Bean Mash
- Kale and Avocado Salad
- Dandelion-Potato Salad (some diets permit potatoes in moderation)
- Spiced Cauliflower Soup
- Easy Millet and Red Pepper Pilaf
- Sweet Potato “Fries”
“Mum, how about considering us permadogs? You know you can count on us. And of course I always rely on my big sister to take good care of me, too.”
“Aw, zip it, Chaser–you’re making me blush.”
PS, I Love You: V-Day Dinner 2009
February 18, 2009
DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS HAS MOVED!
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As always, thanks for reading. I look forward to hearing from you on the new site.
(“Um, Mum, we are coming with you, aren’t we? Because (and sorry to have to tell you this), we actually have more fans on this blog than you do.”)
[Dig that romantic lighting in this photo!]
I have a new love, and it’s not the HH.
(“What? Mum, you’re not getting a divorce, are you? Because who’s going to walk us in the morning if Dad is gone??“). Now, before I go and scare The Girls, I should specify that I’m not referring to a human object of my affection. I’m talking about a new food-related amore: celeri rémoulade. (“Phew! Mum, you really shouldn’t scare us that way. We’re very sensitive, you know.”)
Let me backtrack a bit and explain. Even though the HH and I do celebrate Valentine’s Day, for the past few years we’ve done so a day or two after the fact, in order to avoid the too-crowded-too-expensive-too-mushy restaurant crowds who seem to roll out like fog off a San Francisco pier all on that one day. Last year (the first V-day to occur after I started writing this blog), I broke all previous records and assembled a multi-course, ultra-extravagant, über-romantic and oh-so-dirty dinner (no, no, no, that would have scared the dogs even more than a breakup! We’d never offend their delicate sensibilities that way. I meant “dirty” as in, “generating a lot of dirty dishes,” silly!). I vowed that this year, we’d move to the other end of the spectrum, with a simple, quick, yet equally delectable meal. (“Thanks, Mum. That divorce scare was more than enough for one day.”)
I’d actually chosen the appetizer over a month ago, after reading about celeri rémoulade on Molly’s blog. Her description was so alluring–rapturous, almost–citing the “clean, fragrant crunch of celery root, and the alchemy of mayonnaise and Dijon mustard. . . . somewhat rich [with a] flavor [that’s] light, bright, even hungry-making, a perfect start to a meal,” that I knew I had to try it out. The only glitch, of course, is that traditionally, the dish contains copious amounts of both mayonnaise and yogurt (the vegan versions of which are a tad too processed for my liking). Never mind; I decided to deal with that later.
For the main course, I considered a recipe for Tempeh Stroganoff I’d found in an old (October 2007!) issue of Vegetarian Times.
[11:32 AM. Ricki and the HH sit at the kitchen table, sipping tea and nibbling on muffins. The Girls lie on the carpet in front of the fireplace, Chaser sprawled with her belly facing the fire, while Else lies curled in a ball.]
Ricki: How about this tempeh stroganoff from Vegetarian Times?
HH: No.
Ricki: But it sounds delicious! And it’s even gluten-fr–
HH: Uh-uh. No. Nada. No way. Nein. [As if to remind Ricki of a forgotten promise]: No tofu.
Ricki: But it’s not tofu. It’s tempeh.
HH: Tempeh, tofu–same difference. No soy products.
Ricki: [pouting] Well, but, this is what I want for dinner!
HH: Okay, fine. I’ll make a steak and have the stroganoff as a side dish.
Ricki: That’s why I love you, sweetheart. Happy Valentine’s Day! Kiss kiss squeeze squeeze hug hug. . .
Okay, I didn’t really say that. But I did think it. Here’s what I did say:
Ricki: Well, in that case, I think I’ll make it with these fabulous tempeh meatless balls that I read about on Happyveganface.
HH: Still not eating it.
Me: That’s fine, HH. But just because you’re cooking your own steak doesn’t mean you don’t have to help me make the stroganoff.
HH: Okay.
Ricki: That’s why I love you, sweetheart. Happy Valentine’s Day! Kiss kiss squeeze squeeze hug hug. . .
We figured we could whip up the stroganoff in under an hour (bake the meatballs while I made the sauce; julienne the celery root while the stroganoff simmered), having time to leisurely prepare the meal ensemble while listening to some Rodrigo, exchange good-natured banter, toss cashews to The Girls and sip our favorite bargain basement champagne, sort of like we used to do in the early days of our relationship. We’d have the early part of the day to relax in our jammies, peruse the newspaper, play with The Girls, check favorite blogs, and so on. Perfect!
After a chillaxing day (browsing the paper, taking The Girls for a trail-walk, visiting the workout club–how ya doin’, burly guy with the black knee socks? Nice to see you again, septuagenarian couple with the matching T-shirts! Nice day, isn’t it, bleached blonde with the flirty giggle!), we finally turned to dinner.
Perhaps I should have planned this “easy peasy” meal just a tad more carefully. (Of course, by the time I got round to cooking, I was semi sloshed on Segura Viudas, which may have contributed to my somewhat inefficient kitchen artistry–but still).
First, I discovered that the cashews (the main ingredient in the homemade sour cream) required an hour’s soaking, which set our prep time back by an hour. No problem: I’d whir together some homemade vegan mayonnaise (I used the recipe in Cozy Inside, but this one sounds just as good) and whip up the meatballs while the nuts soaked. Then, I’d quickly prep the sour cream and throw together the stroganoff while the HH grilled his steak. We’d be done and ready to dig in by 7:00 PM at the latest.
[7:00 PM. Having forgotten about the initial chopping and sautéing involved, Ricki is still mixing ingredients for the meatballs. Sounds of rumbling tummies can be heard in the background.]
HH: So, um, what’s our ETA for dinner?
Ricki: Well, I’ll just pop these meatballs in the oven–I couldn’t bear to fry them–and then make the mayo and sour cream, and then I can whip up the stroganoff, and then the celeri rémoulade, oh, and then I guess we should think about dessert–
HH: I thought this was going to be a quick and easy dinner.
Ricki [pouting]: Well, now, I suppose it HAS been easy for YOU, hasn’t it, Mr. Lazypants? I mean, I’VE done all the work so far, I’m standing here covered in onion juice and flour and cashew crumbs, and YOU’VE been sittng there all day reading the paper and playing with the dogs, sipping your champagne, now, haven’t you?? Well, I wouldn’t be complaining right about now if I were you, mister, you’d better watch yourself, or else—
HH: Um, well, I’m actually happy to help. Just tell me what to chop. Oh, and here’s your Valentine’s Day present [brandishing chocolate].
Me: Oh, that’s why I love you, sweetheart! Happy Valentine’s Day! Kiss kiss squeeze squeeze hug hug. . .
Ultimately, we didn’t sit down at the table until well after 8:00 PM (have you ever julienned a celery root by hand??? Insanity, I tell you–sheer insanity). But the results were well worth it. The celeri rémoulade was, as Molly promised, fresh, crisp, light, and entirely irresistible. I really did fall in love, and ate two servings before even thinking about my stroganoff.
The main course, too, offered a winning combination of succulent, filling meatless balls atop a plate of velvety, herbaceous sauce. It practically hummed its smooth melody of rich, sour cream and savory, toothsome mushrooms.
It may have been more complex than anticipated, and it may have taken six times as long as anticipated, and it may have been cobbled together from seven different recipes intended for seven other purposes. . . but this meal was remarkable all the same.
After all, who ever said the road to true love was an easy one?
In case you’d like to reproduce the meal yourself (if you happen to have three and a half hours to spare some weekend), here’s how I assembled it.
And since celery root is available in Ontario in February, this post is my submission to Maninas’s event, Eating with the Seasons, for February.
Vegan Celeri Rémoulade
adapted from Orangette
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
Meatball Stroganoff (GF option)
based on a recipe in Vegetarian Times, October 2007
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
Last Year at this Time
: Juicy Cuisine and Crunchy Granola
© 2009 Diet, Dessert and Dogs
Of Pods and Poetry: Arame and Edamame Salad
February 15, 2009
Diet, Dessert and Dogs has moved!
If you’re reading this page, you’ve landed on the old site. Please visit the new location by clicking here–and don’t forget to update your readers and blogrolls!
As always, thanks for reading. I look forward to seeing you at the shiny new Diet, Dessert and Dogs!
“Um, Mum, we are coming with you, aren’t we? Because (and sorry to have to tell you this), we actually have more fans than you do on this blog.”]
Full disclosure: even if I hated seaweed and loathed green soybeans, I would still have tasted this salad based on the poetry of its name alone. I mean, how can you pass up such alliteration, such euphony, such gastronomic lyricism?
Just listen to it: AH-ra-may. EEE-da-MAH-may. “Arame” brings to mind “aria.” And “Edamame” –well, “edamame” just makes me want to break out into song: “How I love ya, how I love ya, my EEE-da-MAH-MAYYEEE. . . .”
When I think of poetry, most of the time I think of how much I abhorred it in university (mostly because I could never understand it). Even when I went on a poetry bender at the suggestion of my crush-cum-mentor, Dr. D, I never quite “got” it. Let’s see; here’s my experience with poetry, in a nutshell: T.S. Eliot’s “Love Song of J Alfred Prufrock” –I did dare, I did dare, but it just would not sing to me; Wallace Stevens’s “Sunday Morning,”–say what? WHO is the mother of beauty? (Just too creepy); Ezra Pound’s “In a Station of the Metro“–I was haunted by apparitions in every crowd for months; ee cummings’s “in-just”–it was spring and the world was mud-luscious, but the poems just weren’t; Sylvia Plath’s “Daddy“–I felt the need to throw away my black telephone; William Carlos Williams’s “The Red Wheelbarrow“–(because so much depends on a red poet–no, make that red poet’s society–no; oh, whatever. Who cares?)
In the end, I felt as if I’d read thousands of miles of poetry and all I got was a lousy T-shirt.
One form of verse that always did intrigue me, though, was haiku (you were wondering how all this related to the recipe, weren’t you? And here we are: both Japanese-themed!). I’m sure you’re familiar with the stuff–a specific set of three metered lines, first seven syllables, then five, then another seven. What’s great about haiku is that pretty much anyone can do it.
Here are some examples to give you an idea:
Poetry scares me.
Once, I tried to understand.
Alas! What a waste.
Or this:
Winter is cold, long.
Snow falls, so soft and so white.
Must I suffer so?
Or how about:
Elsie sleeps sweetly.
Chaser is a crazy girl.
Sit! Stay! Be like her!
In fact, the HH informs me that even he composed in this form of verse once, in grade school. Here’s his masterpiece:
He comes off the ride.
As the fair whirls round his head,
His dinner comes up.
Ah, yes, HH, The Sensitive Artiste.
More than anything else, I think that haiku makes poetry easy and accessible.
Well, think of this salad as the haiku of Japanese food, if you like–making seaweed accessible to all (or “sea vegetables,” if you prefer the more literary term). If you’ve ever wondered about kombu, nori, wakame, dulse, or any of those others but have been afraid to try them, this seaweed salad is for you. In fact, it’s already been taste-tested (and mightily approved) by hundreds of thousands of others, since I modeled this recipe on the extremely popular salad of the same name sold at Planet Organic stores. Except at Planet Organic, it sells for something like $6.99 per 100 grams ($31.73 a pound), which means you pay approximately $17.42 for two tablespoons (okay, I’m exaggerating–but just a little). Clearly, my version is infinitely preferable.
The salad is incredibly simple to prepare, with just arame (a fairly mild seaweed that looks sort of like black spaghetti) and edamame (green soy beans) as the major ingredients. Toss these with a rice vinegar/sesame oil dressing and some lightly toasted sesame seeds, and you’ve got yourself a delectable dish that perfectly combines sweet (the beans), salty (the tamari) and even umami (the seaweed). The bonus is a great source of protein and Vitamin C from the edamame, plus some much-needed trace minerals (and a few major ones, too) from the seaweed.
The soy and seaweed
Are in perfect harmony.
You will love this dish.
Arame and Edamame Salad
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
© 2009 Diet, Dessert and Dogs
Raw Imitation “Fried Rice”*
December 5, 2008
DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS HAS MOVED! PLEASE VISIT US AT THE SHINY NEW HOME OF DDD, BY CLICKING HERE.
* Or, “Nothing Like Fried Rice, Really, But Still One Darned Tasty Cauliflower Salad”
[Sorry about the blur. I may need to return to my old point-and-shoot until I finally read that new camera manual!]
For those of us fascinated by the topic of food, December is more or less highjacked by baking projects. Cookies for the cookie exchange. Bars and squares for the gift tins. Cakes for the pot lucks. Croquembouche for the neighbourhood party.
Taken to its syllogistic conclusion, the state of affairs in which many of us find ourselves this month would go something like this:
Major Premise: December is filled with many types of baking.
Minor Premise: All types of baking require taste-testing.
Conclusion: Therefore, December is filled with all types of taste–testing sampling quality control eating–something like 4,287 different sweets, types of chocolate, candy, cookies, fudge, frosting, glazed nuts, trifles, truffles, cakes and pies–thereby creating a massive spike in caloric intake for the month, which will lead to outright neglect of all other food groups and the overindulgence of rich, alcoholic and chocolate-based comestibles during the next four weeks or so, to the inevitable result of chocolate overload and the proverbial 7 pound weight gain over the holiday period. *
Well, given my own propensity to binge on sweets and carbs over the holidays, I thought I’d take some advice I heard dispensed by a dietician on a local CBC radio show the other day about “How Not to Gain Weight Over the Holidays.”
Get a load of this: the dietician (who shall remain nameless–she probaby wouldn’t want you to know her name after this advice, anyway, but mostly because I can’t actually remember her name) said something to the effect of, “Well, I know that people are always told to eat a meal before going to a party to avoid overindulging, but I find that people will overindulge anyway. And then they’ve basically eaten two meals, which is really not so good. So what I suggest is, if you do eat a bit too much at a party, then–and I’d never suggest that you do this on a regular basis–but then you can just skip a meal or two the next day to compensate. If you follow this plan over the holidays, you shouldn’t really gain any weight.”
Hallellujah! In a nutshell, here’s December: Pig out. Fast. Pig out. Fast. Pig out. Fast. Pig Out. Cut back a wee bit. Pig out. Fast. Drink champagne and kiss a bunch of strangers.
Truly, I don’t think this plan is very wise, but I’m going to adapt it to my own needs, anyway. During this festive period when I’m more likely to succumb to the siren call of chocolate, I’ve decided to deliberately make the rest of my meals as clean, simple, and vegetable-based as possible. To wit, Raw Imitation Fried Rice.
I came across this recipe a while ago and then, a few days later, happened upon this version by Veggie Delight. Since the dish is raw, it’s much easier to digest than a cooked meal, and won’t tax the digestive system the way heavier, fatter meals can. It’s also mostly vegetables with a hint of dressing, which provided me with yet another novel way to incorporate cauliflower, a vegetable I’m otherwise indifferent about, into my diet.
The salad is crunchy and even a bit juicy, with a hint of toasted sesame and just enough saltiness from the tamari to provide a satisfying contrast to the neutral cauliflower. It’s incredibly easy to make and comes together very quickly courtesy of the processor. I thoroughly enjoyed it and could even feel virtuous as I chomped away.
And it’s the perfect light meal to help you detox between all those tastings of baked goods and treats.
*Okay, so it’s not technically a syllogism. And the conclusion is drawn from the predicate of the premise rather than the subject (totally illogical). And (well, according to Giz, anyway) the average weight gain is only 1.5 pounds over the holidays. As if.
Raw Imitation Fried Rice (aka Cauliflower Salad)
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
Asian-inspired flavors meet light and refreshing salad in this mock fried rice dish. Makes a great side salad or raw main. And a sneaky way to include cauliflower!
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
“Yes, it really is the pits, Mum. It’s also very difficult to lick all the crumbs off the floor with this thing on my head.”
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.
Last year at this time: Dog Day: How Elsie Got Named
Last Minute Thanksgiving Ideas
November 26, 2008
I had intended a lovely post today, in honor of the upcoming Thanksgiving long weekend to the south of us. But time constraints (read: massive, unwieldly pile of essays and assignments to mark) have prevented me from following through. So I’ll just have to wait till the next batch of holidays in December to post about some new, frost-and-snow inspired, treats.
Instead, I thought I’d pull together a few recipes from previous posts that are suitably festive for a holiday table, or the breakfast table the following day (I’ve also got a few detox recipes on the blog–I’ll let you seek those out yourselves, as required). Most of these are fairly quick to make as well, as long as you’ve got the ingredients on hand.
Hope everyone enjoys some togetherness with friends and family, great food, and a bit of time to relax and play.
See you after the holiday!
“Mum, will Elsie be able to play again after the holiday? I mean, it’s just so boring with her out of commission. . . ”
Main Meal Dishes:
- Portobello Steaks
- Nutroast Extraordinaire
- Sweet Potato and Kasha Burgers (can be baked as a loaf)
Side Dishes:
- Cranberry Preserves
- Quinoa, Sweet Potato and Black Bean Bites
- Brussels Sprouts Even My Honey Will Eat
- Sweet Potato and Ginger Salad
- Cauliflower, Parsnip and Bean Mash
- Quinoa, Roasted Beet and Walnut Salad
- Sweet Potato and Carrot Casserole
- Sweet Potato-Cranberry Hash
Desserts:
- Chocolate Pecan Pie
- Holiday Bundt Apple Cake
- Butter Tarts
- Butterscotch Mousse Pie
- Decadent Chocolate Pâté
Breakfast Dishes:
- Raspberry Coconut Coffee Cake (what? Not everyone eats cake for breakfast?)
- French Toast Soufflé with Summer Berries
- Plum-Topped Cornmeal Cake
- Sweet Potato-Cranberry Scones
- Baked Oats
- Earth Bowl Breakfast
- The Best Home Fries Ever
Don’t Mock (Tuna) Me: When “From Scratch” Disappoints
September 9, 2008
DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS HAS MOVED! PLEASE VISIT THE SHINY NEW HOME OF DDD BY CLICKING HERE.
DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS has moved!
If you’re reading this page, you’ve landed on the old site. Please visit the new location by clicking here–and don’t forget to update your readers and blogrolls!
As always, thanks for reading. I look forward to seeing you at the shiny new Diet, Dessert and Dogs!
“Um, Mum, we are coming with you, aren’t we? Because (and sorry to have to tell you this), we actually have more fans than you do on this blog.”
If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, you know I’m a “from scratch” kind of gal. I mean, when you’ve been told you can’t eat anything processed, anything with additives, anything with coloring, anything with refined sweeteners or flours–basically, anything that’s not fresh from the vine or the ground–you learn to cook from scratch. Baptism by (Gas Mark 7) fire, and all that.
As a child, I thought “homemade” was synonymous with “bland and boring.” (Actually, I was onto something there: my mother’s cooking actually was bland and boring). For my sisters and me, the most exciting foods we could imagine came in a box, a jar, or a can. Perfectly round, single-serve “layer cakes” coated in crunchy, “chocolatey” shellac and packaged in individual cellophane bags; McDonald’s large fries and chocolatey “milk” shakes; soft, mushy, impossibly orange and slightly gooey Chef Boy-Ar-Dee Alphagetti; and–the best possible treat my mother could ever offer, the holy grail of convenience foods–Swanson TV Dinners. How we loved that Salisbury Steak with the little square of blueberry cake baked into the center of the aluminum dish!
But such rewards were few and far between. What seemed like a rare and elusive jackpot in our kitchen was common fare for my two best friends, the Gemini twins; all the glamorous, esoteric items that were verboten at our house made regular appearances on their dinner table. I recall many a meal at their place when we kids were served a heaping portion of Hamburger Helper (with added sautéed onions for that homemade touch), along with canned chocolate pudding topped with a dollop of jam and sprinkle of walnuts (to lend some individual flair) for dessert. I loved it–and was entirely envious of their good fortune!
It wasn’t until I was in my 20s and began to cook for myself that I truly appreciated the home cooked dishes I’d been served throughout my youth, despite their insipid flavors. Subsequently, in my 30s, I began to realize how infinitely superior real food was to synthetic (much as SanDeE appreciates this difference in response to Steve Martin’s confused inquiry in LA Story). Since my Great Diet Shift in 2000, I’ve been cooking about 95% from scratch. It’s become a reflex to simply make things myself.
So it never occurred to me to do otherwise when I encountered the famous Mock Tuna recipe for the first time. At first I wondered, how had I missed it? Where had I been living all this time? Mashed, cooked chickpeas, mayo, chopped bits of this and that—a perfect replica of that classic fishy salad, both in appearance and taste. It looked fabulous. Sounded terrific. With an impressive nutritional profile, too: very high protein (11 g per 1 cup serving), high iron, 6% daily calcium–really, how could one go wrong? I knew I had to try it.
First on the ingredient list was “one can of chick peas.” Well, of course I ignored that part. Why would I use canned anything if I could help it? So I soaked my beans overnight, then drained, rinsed, refilled with fresh water, and boiled away. And boiled. The recipe instructed me to mash with a potato masher or fork, but somehow, my beans were still too hard to accomplish such a feat. Instead, I opted for the food processor and blended the entire mound into a pulp. I ended up with little pebble-like pieces of chickpea, nothing like a “mash” at all. I mean, they were TASTY pebble-like pieces, mind you, but pebble-like pieces nonetheless. I liked the mock tuna well enough (even though–sorry, folks–it tastes nothing like tuna) and even made it a few more times. But let’s just say it would never achieve the same iconic status as Hamburger Helper at the Geminis’.
Then, last week while grocery shopping, right there in the canned goods aisle, I was suddenly overtaken by an overwhelming urge, one that was completely out of character (no, nothing like that, you pervs! Shame on you!). I had an urge to buy a CAN of chickpeas. A can! “Maybe, just maybe, using canned chickpeas will make a difference,” I thought. Hard to believe, but in all my 40+ years of eating I had NEVER TASTED CANNED CHICKPEAS. Well, dear readers, the result was truly humbling. In fact, it left me feeling quite sheepish. I’d even venture to say I was cowed (though not to be confused with “resembling a cow.”). Now, I must admit it: sometimes, convenience foods are superior. Truly, the dish was phenomenal. I couldn’t stop eating the stuff!
Imagine this scene: Dinnertime at the DDD household. The HH sits on one side of the table, munching a slice of bison loaf (purchased at the extortionary Planet Organic, because (a) at least it’s organic; (b) the HH demands his meat; (c) the store is 80% empty most of the time and I’m afraid it’s going to go bankrupt before it’s even open a year; and (d) who feels like cooking for the HH when I’ve already mixed up a chickpea spread for myself?). I’m on the other side, eating my delectable mock tuna on a rice cake.
HH: What is that stuff?
Me: Mock tuna. It’s made from chick peas.
HH: Chickpeas? Are you kidding me?
Me: Nope. [chomp, chomp, lip-smack, lick fingertips]
HH: [Hesitantly] Can I try a little?
Me: Sure. [pushes bowl across table]
HH: [Chewing]: Hmm. [Chomp] That’s not too bad. [Chomp]. Tastes sort of like potato salad. [Lip-smack]. Actually, that’s pretty good stuff. [Licks fingertips. Turns back to bison].
Me: Yeah, I see what you mean, it is sort of like potato salad. Mmmnnnmm!
HH: Hmmn. Yeah, like a very good, creamy, delicious potato salad. [reaches over to take another forkful].
Me: [clears throat] Help yourself.
HH: Thanks! [scoops half the mixture onto his plate.]
Me: Guess you like it.
HH: Yeah, this is great stuff! [Chomp, chomp, lip-smack, licks fingertips.]
In the end, the HH did finish his bison, but he also finished up the mock tuna (which was actually a good thing, as I would have scarfed it all up otherwise). He cleared the plate and asked if I could make it again sometime, because “Wow, that’s amazing stuff!”
Lesson learned: Sometimes, it’s okay to use a can for something you could also make from scratch. Oh, and you should always follow the recipe’s instructions.
“Good lesson, Mum. And if Dad ever doesn’t want to finish his bison, you know where to find us.”
And while it may not taste exactly like chick peas, those legumes in this dish make it an ideal entry to My Legume Love Affair, the event created by Susan, and this month hosted by Lucy at Nourish Me.
Mock Tuna Salad (Chickpea Spread)
adapted from this recipe
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This spread is perfect on crackers, as a sandwich filling, or just on its own. It’s creamy, a little spicy, and all around irresistible.
TO VIEW THE COMPLETE RECIPE, PLEASE VISIT THIS PAGE ON THE NEW DIET, DESSERT AND DOGS, BY CLICKING HERE.